It's more than that, darling

"Come on, porn is just all about seeing that icky thing going in and out, in and out..."

-My female ex-class mate whom I bumped into on the train while on my way back to KL.

Men watch porn more than just for the fuck of it, my dear. Here's what we men learnt from it.

-We get to know what's "sex" first hand waaaaaay before the school give us what's the bird and the bee in form 3.

-We get to discover it's actually that enjoyful because we thought our moms were in pain when her moaning got us woke up in the middle of the night.

-We get to know many kind of positions to screw you...in a delicate way :).

-We get to know the purpose of our "tubes" which is more than just to urinate.

-We get to realise that we don't urinate into girls' vaginas.

-We get to know which hole to poke into literally.

Hell, best of all, we learn how to masturbate to control our hormones.


It's more than that girl, it's more than that.

Breaking the zero barrier...and a movie review

I, am Choo Yung Jie, and I am 21 years old. Yup my birthday had passed yesterday so today afternoon I went to treat myself a late birthday present by went to watch....GHOST RIDER, and now I came back with my own review, unbiased, uncut and it sucks monkey balls.

Ghost Rider, another Marvel character that brought to life in silverscreen, with Nicholas Cage casted in as the main character. By now you shouldn't be surprised that some original plots from comic has been changed, just like other comic-to-movie superheroes. Anyway let's kick start my review with the story, yes ?

Johnny Blaze is a amateur stunt rider during his teenage day, he follows his dad Barton Blaze everyday to perform bike stunts in a carnival. Johnny is full of testosterone and he loves to show off his amateur skill in front of the crowd, espacially in front of Roxanne Simpson, who is Johnny's whore love interest. One day Johnny found out his father has cancer and is about to die while preparing to run away with Rixanne. He is depressed untill a demon called Mephistopheles passed by and offer his "help", with a tarde of Johnny's soul. So Johnny accept it anyway and walaa, his father is in high spirit on the next day after he signed the deal. However, demons know how to break the promise and manipulate to their own interest. Barton dies in a stunt crash due to his excited spirit, Johnny is pissed and look for the demon to argue about the deal, but still he is now officially the demon's bitch and he is told to abandon all his happy times and his loved ones, include Roxanne. So off he goes and run away, never return.

Many years later Johnny becomes a world class motorbike stunt and he is loved by everyone in the world. Fate has its own mind as he meet up with Roxanne again, who has became a news reporter. But where he goes, trouble follows, Mephistopheles' son Black Heart is so emo about his father that he wants to take his place to "rule t3h world zomg". So yea the big daddy chicken out and calls Johnny to turn into the Ghost Rider to take his son head on, however Black Heart won't be fighting alone.....

While Johnny is in deep shit, he encounter a mysterious old man called the Caretaker, who offer him his help like he knows Johnny inside out, to fight the bad guys.

The graphic is awesome as usual, I really like the flaming skull and the motorcycle when touched by GR himself. Unfortunately the whole movie suffered greatly due to the so-so plot. The bad guys are all show but no balls, which makes GR looks like one overpowered bastard from hell. However I really like all the comedic moments in the movie, like the one where GR point at the black kid and booms "INNOCENT" and the poor lad faint!! I am also surprised that no one saw GR showed the finger to the policeman after he jumps into the river, which make me the only asshole in the hall laughing -_-". Maybe the cheesy comedies turn alot of people off when I read their reviews, but I like it overall. Nicholas Cage gives an awesome performace as usual, he never let me down when he tries to potray a naive adult Johnny Blaze, just like the comic I read one (GR : Road to Damnation).

So what score should I give ? 7.5/10, so I am looking forward to the sequel. And next movie : 300. :D

Too late

*One scene from graphic novel Preacher*

In the bar, Cassidy sober over something, suddenly he realised something.

Cassidy : Oh no....I'm a wanker, I'M A WANKER !!! I'M THE BIGGEST WANKER IN THE WORLD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's what I feel today.

*slipped an emo pill*

Why must I sleep alone, always ?

Why must I smile with my false feeling to others ?

Why must I feel the pain ?

Why I can't die ?

Why people yell at me ?

Why true love waits ?

Why am I abnormal ?

Why ? Why ? Why ?

*explode*

Damn I feel that it's funny yet annoying at the same time XO. This year seem unusually quiet. No illegal firecracker explosions, no kids running out at midnight, no young Malay kids come bother us with their demand of ang paos so they can be beaten to death. What does it signal ? Economy ain't good ? Or the CNY just getting more boring ?

Sigh, lotsa people will come by to my house tomorrow, mostly my dad's former students, which is something I want to avoid. Somemore I still feel tired mentality, even though cny is a chance for me to rest, as I have to help my mom to pack up ang paos, do laundry and so on, while others can just chill out, wtf ? Sigh, curse my luck for this.

Still thinking which house I will visit today, might ask some of my friends out, as I need to earn some money for my personal interest ;).

So happy CNY to you all, have a prosper days ahead.

*dance*

Tok tok chiang

Next week we will be welcoming the year of the Boar, so happy new year to you all. Have a nice journey, food and life. Fuck Valentine this is the real deal.

For goodness sake...

STOP IT I AM TOO EMO TO CARE PLEASE STOP IT AAAARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

too this and too that

2003 : Man look at me, I have such a large waist that I can't wear a jean like others.

4 years later

2007 : Oh man, with all those loose long pants, I need a small belt !!

I have to face it

I never like v-day (judging by not typing the whole word ? Yeah). It's been 3 years I got into a habit of getting moody for the first 14 days of February (thank goodness my birthday is 10 days after that).

I hate the fact that I am single.

I hate the fact that I have to see couples walking around everywhere.

I hate the fact that v-day presents are more than CNY merchandises.

I hate the fact that love songs start to circle on the radio lately.

and last of all....

I hate the fact that I have to sing a love song for the lovers next wednesday.


Screw it.

Where it all begins (part 4)

Now for the main Decepticons characters :

Megatron

So what can I say about him ? He has a permenant hunger,*cheesy* a hunger for power *cheesy*.With his fusion canon(and a alt mode of Walther P 38), he can blow everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, including Optimus Prime away just by one shot. Only downside is with his power whoring attitude, his subordinates are almost useless, though some of them stand out. But that doesn't stop him from fucking up the galaxy anyway.

The Seekers

From top to bottom : Skywarp, Starscream and Thundercracker.

They are dubbed "seekers" as they always....well, seek and destroy. They are fast and can disappear in a blink of an eye, hence F-15 jet is suitable alt mode for them. Among the three, Starscream is another power whoring decepticons. He always dream of overthrow Megatron and lead the others. However he is no wiser than Megatron, as he knows all kind of tricks Starscream has inside his sleeve, so Starscream will always wait at the right time to back stab him.

Soundwave


Professional in infiltrating autobots' base, cassette player is a suitable alt mode for him, as he will record every details about autobots' plan to counter Decepticons' domination. His 4 companions are Laserbeak (one on his chest), Rumble (blue), Frenzy (red) and Ravage (under his right hand, and it's a jaguar), which all of them turn into a cassette. His unquestionable loyalty to Megatron make him getting more e-penis than Starscream, which insult his ego. Soundwave's monotone is quite famous among TF fans, as he is among the emotionless decepticons out there.

The triple changers



Decepticons have many unique soldiers, this group is the main example. With Transformers can only transform from vehicles to robots, which make it 2, the 2 can transform into 2 different vehicles and a robot themselves. From top to bottom, Blitzwing(a german tank and a russian jet plane) and Astrotrain (a train and a space ship). Their advantages give decepticons the edge over the autobots in combat.

Insecticons

From left : Bombshell, Kickback, Sharpnel

They suck at fighting, but they can eat everything that's metal and produce energon too.

Last but not least....
Constructicons

From left : Scavenger, Hook, Bonecrusher, Longhaul, Scapper & Mixmaster

This group are called the combiners, or gestalt.Constructicons are the only group that have 6 members instead of standard 5 members of TF combiners today. When they combine, they form into a giant robot called Devastator.

Devastator is very deadly in combat. Being a giant robot, it gives a morale boost for decepticons in combat.

That's all for today, next post I will make a short sypnosis on first 2 seasons of generation 1 and introduce more characters to you !! :D

Previous post :
Before Transformers, there's.....
Where it all begins (part 1)
Where it all begins (part 2)
Where it all begins (part 3)